Answers, please

I’ve recently become cognizant that my time in India is quickly waning. When I think of returning home, I’m flooded with a mixture of emotions. I’m anxious to see my family and friends, but there are definitely many things about my life in India that I will greatly miss. I’m sure the India nostalgia will persist forever, just as has my enduring love for Africa.

Living in India has been a difficult experience for me; in some ways even more difficult than the two years that I spent in Italy. (I’ve never been sick so frequently, for instance; despite its reputation for disease, I never once got sick while living and traveling in Africa.)

I felt very strongly that I should come to India. And, since I don’t generally trust feelings, I spent several hours reasoning through the events that transpired that led to my coming; I can only conclude that it was somehow divinely appointed. However, I’m still not sure why God brought me here. No doubt that I’ve learned a lot and progressed immensely while in India. But, I’d hate to think that the trip was necessitated by purely selfish self-developmental reasons. I know that I’m extremely hard-headed but surely God could have found an easier, more efficient way to humble me? Then again, perhaps not. I am pretty stubborn and maybe he decided drastic measures were in order.

It is also possible that the purposes of my exile in India will only reveal themselves in the coming years or perhaps remain a mystery forever. For now, maybe I will have to be content with the time spent here and the relationships gained. Still, a little further guidance from God on the issue would be propitious. Maybe I should work on my listening skills?